April 29, 2007
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Fate and Destiny
Fate. We are all of us occasionally the victim of the notion that somehow we are at the mercy of some invisible force known as fate, that divine power that compels the universe to unfold as it should, as it has already been determined by some cosmic order beyond our scope of understanding. How many times in your life have you believed that things have happened to you because of fate, because it was simply meant to be and no amount of anything could have ever prevented it? It is true that there are some things which are outside of our control, which cannot be helped or stopped. If a friend of mine suddenly is overcome by an ailment and hospitalized, that’s something outside my control; an event I could never have stopped or known was coming, which is of course just how life is sometimes. The danger, however, comes when we begin to feel that the course and direction of our own life is due to fate.
You destiny (not to be confused with your fate) is in no one’s hands but your own. Though it’s tempting to believe that your future is pre-written, it is not any cosmic entity or divine being who controls your actions, it is you. Through the your choices and the decisions you make, you set the course of your destiny and what road you walk on through the course of your life. It’s true that sometimes events happen to us that we cannot help, but no one else decides for you how to react to them and how to continue onwards. I determine through my actions how my life will unfold. I determine through the choices I make what will directly affect me and my life. No one else can force me to do something I do not want to do. Of course, there will be consequences to the choices you make, but there are always consequences to any choice you make, even if that choice is to try to avoid making any choice at all. You could offer up excuses, reasons, all manner of explanations as to why you’re being forced to take one course of action or another, but in reality, no one else can truly force a decision on you. You and you alone make that choice and consequently have an effect on the future of your life.
For example, when I was applying to colleges, I chose to attend Rutgers University’s Engineering school. Could I have gone to a different school? Yes. As anyone who knows me will tell you, though I’m not unskilled at math and science, I never really took a liking to either subject. So why go to Engineering? Well, I could blame my parents, my culture, the expectations placed on me, or any number of other pressures placed on me, but ultimately, it was my decision. I ended up failing out of the engineering program, which I suppose I had to have known was going to happen given how I feel about math and science. Regardless, though, it was my choice to make and I made it. If I really wanted to, I could have made a different choice. It may have carried with it certain consequences, but that doesn’t mean I couldn’t have made the decision anyway. My parents had strong sway in my decision, but again, they are not me. Only I am me and I chose to bow to the expectations that were placed on me despite my dislike of the subjects heavily involved in engineering. You could say it was fate that I go to engineering and fail out, but I say it was my destiny because it was a choice I made, not because it was forced on me, and it is a destiny I could have changed at any time simply by making a different choice. So it is with all of us, that we are not the victims of fate or some higher force that says things must happen a certain way. We have the power to choose the course of our own life and if we decide that the destiny in store for us on our current path is not what we want, it is through our choices that we can change it. Only you have the power to do that, however. No divine force or being or entity can ever alter the direction you’ve set for yourself in your life, you must consciously choose to change directions on your own.
“Fate is for those too weak to determine their own destiny.”
-Kamran Hamid
Comments (2)
hm, that was interesting. I’ve always considered fate and destiny to be the same thing yet there is an amount of free will and self-responsbility within it.
Ha! Your post reminded me of some college student who stood up in church one Sunday, angry that “God let her fail that test.” It was all I could do to keep from falling out of my chair. The obvious question to be asked in that silence was, “Excuse me, but did you study?”
God gets blamed all the time for the dumb crap we do to ourselves. Personal responsibility?
What’s that? =)